Why Are My Eyes So Dilated?

I’m not high. Or into you, probably

Photo by Liam Welch on Unsplash.

“Are you high?” a classmate asked me in second period drama class.

“What? No!” It was ridiculous to even consider, given who I was at age 15 — a nerdy Christian with about three friends. I wouldn’t have even known how to get or use drugs. It was also about 9 a.m.

“Your eyes. They’re really dilated. I thought you were high.”

I received a couple comments like that over my eyes throughout the years, like a friend commenting he’d think I was into him if he didn’t know better, but infrequently enough that I figured it probably wasn’t much to worry about.

Then, I met my ex, the only person I dated long enough for us to laugh about misassumptions about each other from our first date.

“I thought you were on like, LSD,” he said. “Then your eyes were like that on the second date and I figured you weren’t high all the time.”

“Oh.” On one hand, I was glad he had liked me enough to ask me out on a second date even under the assumption that at worst, I took LSD before a simple pizza date and at best, was just kinda weird. On the other hand, it made me anxious as I frantically replayed past social interactions. Had I scared other potential romantic relationships or friendships away with my intense…